A five-story edition of Disposal Day today, because there are many Democratic National Convention happenings to cover:
STORY #1: Barack and Bill
Wherever they decided to schedule former President Bill Clinton, it would have been bad for President Obama. Right before him is impossible, but the night before him gives him more time to worry about how he’s going to measure up. The speech itself was the most characteristically Clintonian thing I’ve ever read: self-congratulatory, but full of triangulations and as straightforward as they come. How do we know for sure it was a success? A bunch of right-wing idiots started talking about Monica, because they had nothing else to say.
STORY #2: Look, it’s Matt Santos!
No, I’m sorry: It was San Antonio’s Mayor Julian Castro. The resemblance is remarkable, you know. The resemblance to Obama’s convention speech in 2004 is also remarkable, but I suppose that works in their favor if they’re trying to create a Democratic narrative (i.e. “We make America the place where all things are possible for people of all races” or something). I appreciated his snark (“Gee, why didn’t I think of that?”), and the fact that he has actual executive experience, so he’ll have that on Obama if he really does want to be the next him. And his daughter Carina? The next Sasha.
STORY #3: The wifely duty
A couple of ex-classmates who generally aren’t political swooned over First Lady Michelle Obama’s speech on the Twitter last night. I personally didn’t find it much better or worse than Ann Romney’s speech; Michelle’s role was defensive and Ann’s was offensive, but ultimately they had the same objective of describing their husbands’ characters. If Obama and former Gov. Mitt Romney (R-MA) agree on anything in the next two months, it’s that their wives make them both look like chumps and should be running against each other instead.
STORY #4: Night of a thousand stars
OK, maybe not a thousand, but it definitely feels that way. While the Republicans had only two doddery old men, the Democrats have Natalie Portman, Scarlett Johanssen, Kerry Washington, the Foo Fighters, will.i.am, Kal Penn, Eva Longoria . . . the list goes on. As if any of these people are in touch with middle-class voters, except the ones who clean their toilets.
STORY #5: The God/Jerusalem thing
I’ll get into that tomorrow. And – spoiler alert – I’ll be mad at everyone. Stay tuned.