It’s time once again for The Future American’s FAIL OF THE WEEK! Every Saturday, I name a person or group who has spent the past seven days behaving in a particularly idiotic way. Since it’s my belief that idiocy knows no politics, nobody is safe.
This week’s fail was brought to you by . . . well, this week. I have no idea why, perhaps something about the weather (Winnipeg’s weather was unusually pleasant), maybe the sun has been frying a few brains here and there, but both President Obama and former Gov. Mitt Romney (R-MA) have completely short-circuited on the economy. If you’re a Romney fan, I might be doing you a favor because Obama committed one more gaffe than Romney in the same span of time, but I’m not going to go easier on him for that. Strap in tight, kids: This one’s bumpy.
Obama gaffe #1: Actually, this wasn’t really a gaffe in that it was completely premeditated: Putting Sarah Jessica Parker and Anna Wintour, the two avatars of all that is shallow and purposeless, in his campaign literature. I can only think of three demographics who wouldn’t laugh their asses off at this: other celebrities; bored housewives; and fashion-obsessed 18- to 25-year-olds women and gay men who dislike the act of thinking. Everyone else will wonder if he really thinks a sizable bloc of voters can be swayed to donate to him by the chance to talk about Balenciaga all evening.
Obama gaffe #2: Yesterday’s press conference, which, by my understanding, took place because he needs to assure people that he’s thinking about the economy. That, apparently, means he’s been thinking about ways to chastise congressional Republicans for not voting for his proposals and saying “The private sector is doing fine,” which is only matched by “The fundamentals of our economy our strong” in terms of ill timing. Yes, growth in the private sector is outpacing growth in the public one, but how many of those private-sector jobs are any good?
Romney gaffe: When Romney’s response included a scoff at the idea that America needs “more firemen, more policemen, more teachers,” one wonders if he would tell someone that the economy gets a better return on its investment when it pays one of these people instead of, say, a telemarketer or a fast-food worker. I hardly think voters of Wisconsin were thinking of these public-sector workers, as opposed to bureaucrats, when they re-elected Gov. Scott Walker (R-WI). And he doesn’t want people to view him as a slash-and-burner?
The idea that one of these idiots will be inaugurated as president next year fills me with yellow bile. Think of how good you could have had it, America. Really think.